Heroes...not the tv show

This morning I awoke with a calm I hadn't had in a very long time, it was almost like hope realized and now on the verge of being fulfilled. My friend OB, the man I love but cannot marry helped me out this month. I am happy that I have solid family and friends to go to without judgement or feeling ashamed. Thank you OB, you are my Hero!

It's been a rough and rocky road...(not the ice cream)

This morning I turned on Joel Osteen and he was speaking directly to me. His message was "your set time is coming." Things are so incredibly hard for me right now that I am once again at a point where I have to make a decision to either buy gas or food. I chose both since I didn't get food last week and since I am temping, I needed gas.

I am living on faith. I have to have a miracle happen this week so that I do not lose it all and be living on the street. Chase is trying to be difficult again. My temp agency is not fighting for me, but trying to survive themselves. I feel like everything is crashing down on me. I am doing my best to keep the faith and not give up. I need money and have no one to borrow it from. I need a decent job that pays decently in order to get back on track.

The good news is that I turned in my final draft of my House spec on Friday. This morning, I began outlining my story for Criminal Minds. I feel good when I write, when I create. I wonder what God has in store for me if it isn't writing? I wonder what God has in store for me period.

This guy I hadn't met but was sort of interested in meeting revealed he has a few kids! I hate it when people lie to me - when will they learn? Not only does he have kids but he is unemployed and being taken care of by his wife, or ex-wife. Guys, don't lie when a good woman crosses your path. It is when you are caught in the lies that keeps you with the wrong woman.

Ok people, happy and good thoughts! Keep me in your prayers!!!!

Thank you!!!

Studio Notes for my House spec

First off I must thank all of the people I have met at ABC who have been very good to me - THANK YOU!!! I received notes on my spec as we all know I need to make it perfect because this is the spec that will get me staffed this season.

Thank you!

6:30 am on a Saturday....

I should be sleeping in since things at work are picking up - yep it's pilot season - and since I am temping in development, I'm not getting much sleep as of late. I've been trying to read the scripts that have been selected and navigating my way through the shooting of the two pilots we're working on. I guess this experience is preparing me for the wonderful world of production. Funny, its just like the wonderful world of publicity. Corporate America is spoiled.

I'm off to do forensics on a criminal minds script. I have not yet decided if I will write a spec. I did complete viewing all of the seasons including this one (all that have been shot), so I am up to date on the show. I am formulating a story in my head and all that know me, know that it must be "off the chain" before I send it to my agent.

Sociopaths and the Entertainment Industry

The other day I began doing research for a white paper on sociopaths, more specifically "How to raise a sociopathic child" - not how to create one but how to help them to NOT become serial killers. First off, there is no cure for the sociopathic condition. Secondly, being a sociopath does not mean you will turn into a killer. I believe that is where everyone is seriously mislead.

Sociopaths exist with the larger concentration right here in the United States. Hmmmm...I wonder why? I bet it has to do with The American Dream; thank you JT Adams! Add the media and thus perpetuates the fall of society, a giving society. I will venture to say there is a high concentration of sociopaths right here in Los Angeles with the majority working within the entertainment industry - too many non-deserving, uneducated and over educated, selfish and greedy people rising to heights in non-traditional and Godless ways.

"Our society is moving in the direction of permitting, reinforcing, and in some instances actually valuing some of the traits listed in the Psychopathy Checklist - traits such as impulsivity, irresponsibility and lack of remorse." - Dr. Robert Hare

Am I wrong?

Oh and yes, I'm researching for my Criminal Minds spec script. My House spec is getting very good reviews. I thought House was a challenge because I am not a MD, but I believe Criminal Minds will be the ultimate challenge because this is what I am an expert in, especially since I subconsciously profile people in my everyday life - it helps me cope to deal with the plethora of egos within the entertainment industry (there's only one SUPER EGO). While I love that profiling aspect of my mind, its also a curse at times because I don't give people a chance to become close. Oh well, I think I'm better off. I don't require closeness (yep a sociopathic tendency).

Women in Law Enforcement

I was chatting with a homeland security former student of mine the other day. He was telling me about the drama of the holiday season. I told him point blank, you guys NEED to have women in better positions! I can almost guarantee that if a woman was screening crazy dude, she would have noticed a bulge in his pants!!! She would have stopped him, searched him and if in fact it was not a bomb but a true bulge, she would have gotten all of his contact information and had a date with him that night!!! Needless to say my friend fell out laughing over the phone. He said, "I thought the first thing a woman looks at on a man was his eyes." I had to divulge a secret, no guys, we check out the package first, then make you turn around, check out the wallet in your back pocket then we look at your eyes! We do have priorities ya know!!!

I crack myself up.

Happy 2010

Things are looking up...not really but I am hopeful things will turn around for the better for me. I'm temping in a familiar place and that makes it good. I am looking forward to change and making things happen for me this year. The good news is that 2009 is over!